Silent Voices
by SYF
Summary: Set after Kaworu dies. Shounen-ai. KaworuShinji. Angst.


This is a tribute to Kaworu and Shinji, one of the Romeo and Juliets of this century. I'm not sure if this is sad or not, and I'm not sure I've really conveyed the irony of their situation. If I haven't, and it sounds really flat, forgive me. I've tried to be as much in character as possible.  
  
Umm...what else? Oh yeah, the disclaimer. You should all have figured out by now that I get nothing out of fanfictions except the pleasure of explaining to my friends why it is I read and write yaoi. That and trying to convert the het fic lovers to yaoi.  
  
And lastly, reviews?  
  
Silent Voices  
  
"How is he?" Brown eyes shimmered with worry.  
  
"He's been sedated but..." A hopeless shrug.  
  
"I see." Tense shoulders slumped in despair.  
  
A regretful sigh. "It's a cruel job isn't it? Being an eva pilot."  
  
Silence.  
  
"...Yes, yes it is." Lips moved in a harsh whisper.  
  
Two bleak pairs of eyes looked through clear glass into a room where a young fourteen-year-old boy lay sleeping.  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Do you really love me?" he asked hopefully. When he received the answer he smiled brightly, something rarely seen on his face.  
  
"What was that song you were singing when I met you?"  
  
"Is that what it's called? Ode to joy? It sounds beautiful."  
  
A soft chuckle escaped the thin lips. A blush stained his face. "I think it's so much more beautiful than me."  
  
"C – Could you sing it for me...to help me go to sleep..."  
  
O Freunde, nicht diese Tone! Sondern, las uns angenehmere anstimmen . .  
  
"Thank you," he whispered as his blue eyes closed gently.  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
A report landed on the desk. A pale hand picked it up and pale eyes scanned the words. "Why is he still not operational?" The voice was icy cold.  
  
"Apparently the task of killing the angel has caused a mental backlash."  
  
Cold eyes looked up. "That is not good enough. We currently only have one eva pilot fully operational. If another angel attacks..."  
  
"..."  
  
Eyes filled with curiosity. "Don't you care about your son? Don't you care about any of the children?" No reproach, no rebuke, only curiosity.  
  
Thin lips curled into a smile. "They are only tools. They are to be used as the situation requires. Broken tools are no use to us, they must be discarded with haste."  
  
"Ahh..."  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Ne, do you remember the shore where we met? How the sun was sinking into the horizon?"  
  
"You do? I remember that for one instant, the colour of the sky reminded me of your eyes. I wish we could see the sunset again."  
  
Blue eyes brightened. "I know, how about we go tomorrow! After school. And we can watch the sunset together."  
  
"You'd like that? So would I? And this time, we can bring a picnic as well, so that we can stay out to watch the stars too."  
  
A sheepish smile lit his face. "You're right, I should go to sleep. Maybe Asuka will wake up tomorrow and Rei and she can come with us."  
  
"Do you think you could sing for me again? I liked it when you sang me to sleep."  
  
Moetsukita chihei no kanata. Hito-suji no asahi ga kagayaku  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"He has failed." A bleak voice announcing the fate of the last angel.  
  
"He chose to die for the sake of one boy." Disgust, contempt, and disinterest.  
  
"Nevertheless the Instrumentality Project will go ahead. We can't afford to fail now," the voice said firmly  
  
"Agreed."  
  
"Agreed." And so it went on until all the members of SEELE had approved of the suggestion.  
  
"Then so be it. Lillith and Adam shall be reunited and Instrumentality shall begin."  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"Ano sa, Kaworu, I learned to play 'Ode to Joy'," he said happily holding his violin on his lap.  
  
He smiles shyly, "I wanted to make you happy." He wrinkled his nose cutely.  
  
"I would be honoured to play. But only if you sing," he bargained. A scowl marred his face at his love's answer.  
  
"Your voice isn't bad. It's wonderful. Please Kaworu?" Blue eyes widened in a puppy doog look designed to melt hearts.  
  
"Yatta!!"  
  
O Freunde, nicht diese Tone! Sondern, las uns angenehmere anstimmen . .  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
She stared after the pale figure walking between two large bodyguards. "Will he ever get better?"  
  
The other woman shook her head. "It's doubtful. He can pilot the eva perfectly fine, but don't expect anything more."  
  
She turned to look at her friend. "What do you mean?"  
  
"He won't talk and when you try to talk to him all he does is stare through you. He listens to command, but that's all you can expect of him. Commander Ikari has told us that is all that's necessary."  
  
"...He doesn't care does he?" she asked harshly.  
  
"Who? His father or him?"  
  
"Both. They both don't care. His father only cares about seeing her again. And he doesn't care about anything anymore." The voice trembled with held back anger and sorrow.  
  
"...It doesn't matter. All the angels are gone and that's all the people of the world care about."  
  
"But was the price really worth it?" Neither could answer that question.  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
He sighed wearily. "I'm so tired."  
  
"I don't know why, I just want to go to sleep and never wake up again. But at the same time I don't want to because that would mean I won't see you again."  
  
The head shook from side to side vehemently. "Don't worry, I won't do that. I am tired but I don't mind it at alla."  
  
He smiled as if the answer were obvious. "I don't mind because as long as you're with me everything is fine."  
  
"You'll stay with me forever ne? You won't ever leave me like my parents did?"  
  
"Arigatou." The soft word was uttered with heartfelt gratitude and love.  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
"They infiltrated the geofront!!!"  
  
"Seal the doors!!!"  
  
"Why aren't they shooting at us?"  
  
"Because we're sitting on the Magi System. They don't want to destroy it."  
  
"It's over."  
  
"Don't be so negative."  
  
"I'm not! It's the truth. It's all over for NERV."  
  
~ * ~ * ~  
  
Blue eyes blinked in confusion. "Why do you look so sad Kaworu?"  
  
"I'm dead? Really? I don't feel dead." He looked down at himself with fascination.  
  
"What does this mean? What'll happen to me now?"  
  
"Oh...how about Asuka, Misato and Rei? Will they be all right?" Worry coloured his voice, as he remembered the three people who had been close to him.  
  
At the answer he smiled with relief. "You're right, I shouldn't worry about them. I'm sure they'll be fine."  
  
"Will you hold my hand Kaworu, and sing for me? I don't feel so lonely when you sing," he requested shyly.  
  
Doko made mo tsuzuiteta tooi hi no aoi sora...  
  
"It doesn't matter if I'm dead. So long as you're with me, everything thing is all right..."  
  
~Owari~ 


End file.
